About
Jermistry
- title in Elvish
- Xoomij listen
- All about Darjeeling
- Learn Hebrew- start with
- Vineyard Music
- "To You" (me on Irish Whistles)
- "Coogee Day" (JM on Kurzweil)
- NZ photoes
- Tassie photoes
- NY&VA photoes
- Монгол&Сибирь
- Kelong photoes
- Cellgroup Stuff
- James' Grad
- Yunnan Pix
Archives
- ноября 2003
- декабря 2003
- января 2004
- февраля 2004
- марта 2004
- апреля 2004
- мая 2004
- июня 2004
- июля 2004
- августа 2004
- сентября 2004
- октября 2004
- ноября 2004
- декабря 2004
- января 2005
- февраля 2005
- марта 2005
- апреля 2005
- мая 2005
- июня 2005
- июля 2005
- августа 2005
- сентября 2005
- октября 2005
- ноября 2005
- декабря 2005
- января 2006
- февраля 2006
- марта 2006
- апреля 2006
- мая 2006
- июня 2006
- июля 2006
- августа 2006
- сентября 2006
- октября 2006
- ноября 2006
- декабря 2006
- января 2007
- февраля 2007
- марта 2007
- апреля 2007
- мая 2007
- июня 2007
- июля 2007
- августа 2007
- сентября 2007
- октября 2007
- ноября 2007
- декабря 2007
- февраля 2008
speak friend and enter
понедельник, сентября 20, 2004
Valley of Decision
בְּעֵמֶק הֶחָרוּץ
be.e.mek he.kha.ruts
What a few months, these! Rosh Hashanah has just passed, and Yom Kippur is coming this weekend. Its been a brisk year since the last Yom Kippur. Time, space, tension all seem scrambled-tangled up. So here I am. Not quite at the threshold of a normal year, but at the Threshold of a New Year, nonetheless. The High Holy Days of HaShem.
This time this year, I now stand at the valley of decision. My valley. Big questions, feeling the gravity of things. No excuses of time and duty to shade me from the harshness of a quarter century. More to come, inevitable, inescapable, no longer inculpable. It comes down to motive, support, love, time and money.
I now stand at the edge of a sliver of opportunity having both time and some money- how often is that? What to do now? What to do next? Why do? I do? You do. I go. Where? There. Eh? Mea Culpa.
So I look at schools; I do my part.
Answer my call the way I know how.
Fearing the promise, balking at the contrived.
Knowing His faithfulness to lead and provide.
The Christ-life and the Light of Life
To shine in me, to walk with Him.
Easy to profess, hard to live out.
Shout, cry and groan in doubt.
In the meantime, I'm looking at Ulan Bataar, Hovsgol Nuur, Morin Huur, of lovely, friendly people by the name of Bataa, Badnaa and Boogii. Irkutsk and Orkhon, train schedules and petty bureacracy, late fall and advancing winter. Minya panimayoo gavaritch par-Russki! Isvinityeh? Nyet nyet, eta skolka stoit? Da, Slava Bogh!
Shall I go or shall I stay,
and if go, for how long and what shall I say?
Vanity, and a chasing of the wind?
God, grant me with the wisdom to pray!
How do we know the purpose of God, and how do we follow it? Quite definitely, the best place you ever want to be in your life, is to be in the Middle of the Good and Perfect will of God. That's theoretical- how do we put that into practice? It seems to me, from my experience and what I understand of the Goodness of God, taking into consideration the limitations of imperfect man, finding the will of God in our lives and living there seems not to be an end in itself(its not supposed to be), but a process.
Its just like Ye Ol' powerful reiterative method in Calculus- the Newton-Raphson Method. You are given a [usually non-linear, convergent] function, and you try to find its solutions. Using the N-R method, you basically reiterate- a rough solution is obtained, which you plug in for a second round. That rough solution isn't the final solution, but it certainly is a good indicator of where that perfect answer lies. When you plug that rough solution in, you get a more refined answer, which nevertheless still falls short of the perfect solution. And you do this a few more times. Depending on your function (hopefully convergent!) and your starting bid (not absurbly off), you will find that with each iteration, you get closer and closer to the perfect answer. Of course, in an imperfect (albeit mathematical world), we'll never ever quite get there. But close enough. The assurance, however, is we will definitely get closer. Blame it on asymptotes, ground toads, lymph nodes and tree frogs.
Likewise, finding the good and perfect will of God in our lives is a process- an iterative one, which goes on all the days of our lives until we are free of this fallen body. (I'm no gnostic!) I think the relief in this is that that's the whole point- to work through that process of reiteration (neither am I Buddhist!). Sure, to arrive at that goal is one thing, but the process points to our obedience and humility to the Author and Perfector of our faith. That, right now, seems to be the whole point.
He puts markers in our lives- milestones, roadblocks, signposts... those sort of things.
We don't get to Oz on an 28hr direct non-stop flight.
No. We don't get straight there.
We sip and taste of His goodness.
We walk and weather,
Sit and gather.
Cast our nets wide, and
Be obedient to obey when
He says to cast our nets on the right side.
That's the story for me right now anyway. Cast my bread on many waters, spreading my net wide, trying to be obedient to walk that seemingly dead-end path, that everyone thinks is a lemon. What will it take for me to walk my days, preserving my heart and nourishing my soul?
We are led into the valley of decision. What will we make of Christ? How do we approach his Throne of Grace? Will we look into His face because we've been longing and loving to all our lives, or will we slink away in shame and fear? How will you meet the Creator and Writer of the poem of our lives- a holy letter, written by the blood of the Author to be living sacrifices on the altar of faith, hope and love!
בְּעֵמֶק הֶחָרוּץ
be.e.mek he.kha.ruts
What a few months, these! Rosh Hashanah has just passed, and Yom Kippur is coming this weekend. Its been a brisk year since the last Yom Kippur. Time, space, tension all seem scrambled-tangled up. So here I am. Not quite at the threshold of a normal year, but at the Threshold of a New Year, nonetheless. The High Holy Days of HaShem.
This time this year, I now stand at the valley of decision. My valley. Big questions, feeling the gravity of things. No excuses of time and duty to shade me from the harshness of a quarter century. More to come, inevitable, inescapable, no longer inculpable. It comes down to motive, support, love, time and money.
I now stand at the edge of a sliver of opportunity having both time and some money- how often is that? What to do now? What to do next? Why do? I do? You do. I go. Where? There. Eh? Mea Culpa.
So I look at schools; I do my part.
Answer my call the way I know how.
Fearing the promise, balking at the contrived.
Knowing His faithfulness to lead and provide.
The Christ-life and the Light of Life
To shine in me, to walk with Him.
Easy to profess, hard to live out.
Shout, cry and groan in doubt.
In the meantime, I'm looking at Ulan Bataar, Hovsgol Nuur, Morin Huur, of lovely, friendly people by the name of Bataa, Badnaa and Boogii. Irkutsk and Orkhon, train schedules and petty bureacracy, late fall and advancing winter. Minya panimayoo gavaritch par-Russki! Isvinityeh? Nyet nyet, eta skolka stoit? Da, Slava Bogh!
Shall I go or shall I stay,
and if go, for how long and what shall I say?
Vanity, and a chasing of the wind?
God, grant me with the wisdom to pray!
How do we know the purpose of God, and how do we follow it? Quite definitely, the best place you ever want to be in your life, is to be in the Middle of the Good and Perfect will of God. That's theoretical- how do we put that into practice? It seems to me, from my experience and what I understand of the Goodness of God, taking into consideration the limitations of imperfect man, finding the will of God in our lives and living there seems not to be an end in itself(its not supposed to be), but a process.
Its just like Ye Ol' powerful reiterative method in Calculus- the Newton-Raphson Method. You are given a [usually non-linear, convergent] function, and you try to find its solutions. Using the N-R method, you basically reiterate- a rough solution is obtained, which you plug in for a second round. That rough solution isn't the final solution, but it certainly is a good indicator of where that perfect answer lies. When you plug that rough solution in, you get a more refined answer, which nevertheless still falls short of the perfect solution. And you do this a few more times. Depending on your function (hopefully convergent!) and your starting bid (not absurbly off), you will find that with each iteration, you get closer and closer to the perfect answer. Of course, in an imperfect (albeit mathematical world), we'll never ever quite get there. But close enough. The assurance, however, is we will definitely get closer. Blame it on asymptotes, ground toads, lymph nodes and tree frogs.
Likewise, finding the good and perfect will of God in our lives is a process- an iterative one, which goes on all the days of our lives until we are free of this fallen body. (I'm no gnostic!) I think the relief in this is that that's the whole point- to work through that process of reiteration (neither am I Buddhist!). Sure, to arrive at that goal is one thing, but the process points to our obedience and humility to the Author and Perfector of our faith. That, right now, seems to be the whole point.
He puts markers in our lives- milestones, roadblocks, signposts... those sort of things.
We don't get to Oz on an 28hr direct non-stop flight.
No. We don't get straight there.
We sip and taste of His goodness.
We walk and weather,
Sit and gather.
Cast our nets wide, and
Be obedient to obey when
He says to cast our nets on the right side.
That's the story for me right now anyway. Cast my bread on many waters, spreading my net wide, trying to be obedient to walk that seemingly dead-end path, that everyone thinks is a lemon. What will it take for me to walk my days, preserving my heart and nourishing my soul?
We are led into the valley of decision. What will we make of Christ? How do we approach his Throne of Grace? Will we look into His face because we've been longing and loving to all our lives, or will we slink away in shame and fear? How will you meet the Creator and Writer of the poem of our lives- a holy letter, written by the blood of the Author to be living sacrifices on the altar of faith, hope and love!
